Somebody Always Gets Hurt

I wish there was a way to open up your heart and know exactly what you wanted or that nobody could get hurt because they all wanted different things. It seems that life would be a lot easier if we didn't love some of the same things as someone else so that when it was taken, we weren't left a crumbled mess.  This imperfect sinful world is so hard sometimes.  It seems that only the things you really want or the things that send you on an amazing adrenaline rush are the hardest things to come by because obstacles like to camp out in front of your path towards getting them.  They are those things you imagine when you hear a song that maybe has nothing to do with it but somehow brings you back to that one thing or the place you see yourself living when all is said and done and you finally have enough money.  It is just all a big race for that thing and the question is - do we ever really get it?  You always see movies where the actor strives for something and then has a pivotal moment where they realize that they are tired and don't really need it anymore.  You may not feel anything similar to what I am explaining but I just feel like we shouldn't give up.  I feel like if you really really want something and your heart scrapes your chest every time you feel yourself receiving it or you sweat when you imagine resting in that persons arms that nothing should hinder your way.  Who cares about what people may think or what mess you may create- why is the concept of being mature and safe the reason to give up?  I am having a weird thinking day and ultimately feel as though I am not fighting for something I want- but the thing is - I don't even know what that is.

taking a ride on the trippytrain

These floating heads have been roaming in a plain white background for about a year until BAM!

Thick and Thin

This was an art project and we were supposed to illustrate thick and thin and this is what popped into my trippy mind.  Yes, it is a fetus and it is one of my favorite pieces.  I love to draw over watercolor, I don't know why and I am also fascinated with the whole pregnancy deal - so maybe that's why it is my favorite?  

Anyways, today I had a very comical experience this morning on my way to school.  As I was driving down the road sweating because I like the hot air to blow on my cold hands on the steering wheel and instead of turning it completely off- I sacrifice the rest of me to sweat.  Anyways, I was already rushing because not only did I get gas, but I felt compelled to back track to Chik-fila and order a medium fantastic lemonade through the drive thru, which was twice as long and again I know, the way I do things makes no sense.  So, to the funny/ not so funny part.  As I was sipping my sour lemonade I look over to see not just one, but both of my ex-boyfriends parents and of course, made eye contact.  It was one of those moments that you don't know whether you should look and wave or act like you are completely wrapped up in your lemonade?  So.......... I definitely acted as if that lemonade was the most interesting/most amazing/ magical lemonade I had ever tasted and sped off.  

Hope you have a lemonade in situations such as that ;)

taken in Lima, Peru

I Creep in Your Homes

I have a website. It is www.cassidyconway.com and it served as a way to raise money so I could go to Mexico/Peru and such. As I was selling paintings that I thought anyone could also do I realized something crazy... a part of me was being put up on display in complete strangers homes. And the best part about it was that most of the paintings I sell have scriptures written on them. I realized that I don't have to go to another country or make a huge process of missionary work because I am doing my own right here in my paint splattered bathroom. (which my mother cries every time she sees a new blob) I am putting my heart into a piece and not only enjoying it but also letting others enjoy it every time they walk by it hanging in their house. I never could understand how people could sell such dear pieces of art to strangers until I began doing so and now I want others to have it all. I make art not for my own pleasure of keeping it all to myself, even though I do enjoy painting despite who sees it, but I love being able to share my passion with some one else. It is much more rewarding to celebrate a gift when shared with someone else. Please do not hide yourself away but open that heart and sing your own song.

Let the world despise and leave me,

They have left my Savior, too.

Human hearts and looks deceive me;

Thou art not, like them, untrue.

Why wait?

I found this picture surfing the web for ideas to make fundraiser posters and thought it was beautiful. I got a netflix box for Christmas.. I know, random... but it really is the greatest thing! Anyways, I got a box and have been watching documentaries about Darfur and all the trouble in Africa. I know everyone talks about how sad it is and how big of a problem it is because there are just too many people but when did that ever matter to God? Wasn't it Him who removed all the Israelites from Egypt and wasn't He the one to save Daniel from lions or Noah from the flood? When has it ever been too big of a problem to solve... when you try and solve it based on your abilities. We cannot do this alone. I am going to help. I don't know how yet but all I know is that my heart hurts too much to sit back and wait on something to happen or hunger to just disappear. With God's help I will devote my life to serving and until poverty, hunger and diseases are cured, which is not looking soon.