My younglife small group is reading through a book called In the Name of Jesus by Henri J.M. Nouwen and just after finishing the first section I am so pumped! It focuses on Christian leadership and what that looks like or doesn't look like and how our world has transformed the entire concept into something far from what it should be.
Well, I am not going to give you the entire story but basically Henri Nouwen goes from being a professor at Harvard to living amongst the mentally handicapped and gets his world rocked. (seriously, if you ever get a chance you should pick this book up) Anyways, he talks about something that really hit home with me. He says that he has realized with his new surroundings that his past or reputation (like the fact that he has written a few books and is highly esteemed in the academic world) has little to no affect on these people. It is because they cannot understand or they simply do not care who he was but rather who he is. He is thrown into a vulnerable, raw situation that requires his very own "freshness" every single time.
"Not being able to use any of the skills that had proved so practical in the past was a real source of anxiety. I was suddenly faced with my naked self, open for affirmations and rejections, hugs and punches, smiles and tears, all dependent simply on how I was perceived at the moment. In a way, it seemed as though I was starting my life all over again. Relationships, connections, reputations could no longer be counted on."
"These broken, wounded, and completely unpretentious people forced me to let go of my relevant self -- the self that can do things, show things, prove things, build things -- and forced me to reclaim that unadorned self in which I am completely vulnerable, open to receive and give love regardless of any accomplishments."
Nouwen also says that one of our greatest temptations is to be relevant and of course that relevance is different for everyone. For me, I think it is to be able to relate or be successful in certain things - However, Nouwen says we should be "completely irrelevant and stand in this world with nothing to offer but [our] vulnerable self." I don't know why but that quote specifically paints such an amazing picture in my mind of someone standing in the middle of chaos with their hands stretched out and saying "this is me." Vulnerability is extremely difficult, but it never fails that in those times we are most honest and able to let others see the REAL us, which can be scary but such a sweet blessing when experienced. We need to let go and let God into our core because we build walls immediately around those most vulnerable parts about us.
This is something I am working on - letting go of who I am according to my reputation, works, or past relationships and being my own "self" in each new moment. Being irrelevant and vulnerable.
Well, I am not going to give you the entire story but basically Henri Nouwen goes from being a professor at Harvard to living amongst the mentally handicapped and gets his world rocked. (seriously, if you ever get a chance you should pick this book up) Anyways, he talks about something that really hit home with me. He says that he has realized with his new surroundings that his past or reputation (like the fact that he has written a few books and is highly esteemed in the academic world) has little to no affect on these people. It is because they cannot understand or they simply do not care who he was but rather who he is. He is thrown into a vulnerable, raw situation that requires his very own "freshness" every single time.
"Not being able to use any of the skills that had proved so practical in the past was a real source of anxiety. I was suddenly faced with my naked self, open for affirmations and rejections, hugs and punches, smiles and tears, all dependent simply on how I was perceived at the moment. In a way, it seemed as though I was starting my life all over again. Relationships, connections, reputations could no longer be counted on."
"These broken, wounded, and completely unpretentious people forced me to let go of my relevant self -- the self that can do things, show things, prove things, build things -- and forced me to reclaim that unadorned self in which I am completely vulnerable, open to receive and give love regardless of any accomplishments."
Nouwen also says that one of our greatest temptations is to be relevant and of course that relevance is different for everyone. For me, I think it is to be able to relate or be successful in certain things - However, Nouwen says we should be "completely irrelevant and stand in this world with nothing to offer but [our] vulnerable self." I don't know why but that quote specifically paints such an amazing picture in my mind of someone standing in the middle of chaos with their hands stretched out and saying "this is me." Vulnerability is extremely difficult, but it never fails that in those times we are most honest and able to let others see the REAL us, which can be scary but such a sweet blessing when experienced. We need to let go and let God into our core because we build walls immediately around those most vulnerable parts about us.
This is something I am working on - letting go of who I am according to my reputation, works, or past relationships and being my own "self" in each new moment. Being irrelevant and vulnerable.
But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
...For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
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