Today I had the incredible opportunity to babysit 3 little kids today who brought me so much joy. Yes, it was draining trying to keep up with them and I still gag every time I change a diaper but it helped clear my head because the only thing I could focus on was the present and what the kids needed moment by moment. There was hardly any down time to think! Kids are genuine... that's what I like most =)
Lately, I feel like all I have been able to do is stress about deadlines or lines memorized or making enough time for everything. On the go- that's how these past few weeks have been and as much as I love to be involved and busy, I am terrible at slowing down when I have a lot to do. What's different about the most recent blob of busyness is that I find that I have been wasting a lot of time... This is a terrible state for me to get in! I do not leave enough time for myself, especially my relationship with God! I swear if I leave my phone for 5 minutes I come back to either an email, text or missed call that needs to be answered. It's overwhelming when you feel like you have to be "on call" 24/7 and have pressure to respond to other people or else.
Rob Bell spoke at Belmont University tonight. Now, I know there has been a lot of talk about his new "controversial" book but I don't feel the need to talk about it on here because 1. I have not read the book and 2. I just do not study Rob Bell's beliefs enough to have an argument. However, I was inspired by some of the things he said tonight like...
"God loves you whether people need you or not."
That struck me and I did not realize why until I sat down and began to type this post. As I am typing even, I have no idea where this is going so we'll see hah
With that quote I kind of stepped back and realized 1) No one honestly needs me and 2) I am taking too much credit. I am acting like if I don't help or respond the world will end. I have a problem with giving too much of myself and breaking down eventually- I often forget to fill up with Christ, so by the time I reach the end of my tank there is literally nothing left and I want to just curl up in a ball. My old religion teacher used to always tell me that I give too much of myself and it is dangerous. I understand what she means exactly because I get caught up in it still -not as much but it is a habit that I am learning to break.
It's like when my tank runs empty in my car and my moms gets so mad because she always tells me to fill it back up when the tank is half way full and not wait until I have 0 miles left.... What if I get stuck out in the middle of nowhere and your tank runs out? I am not made of gasoline - I can't help at all! Also, if we wait until the very end then it takes so much longer to fill back up, doesn't it? Why not just fill back up every time we use our "gas" so that we are never empty?
-Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world."
-"Sir," they said, "from now on give us this bread."
-Then Jesus declared, " I am the break of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and He who believes in me will never be thirsty."
John 6:32-35
You see? God never runs out. There is always plenty to fill up with and if I have this unlimited supply, why would I go anywhere else? When I am running on empty, all I have to do is ask for more.
Lately, I feel like all I have been able to do is stress about deadlines or lines memorized or making enough time for everything. On the go- that's how these past few weeks have been and as much as I love to be involved and busy, I am terrible at slowing down when I have a lot to do. What's different about the most recent blob of busyness is that I find that I have been wasting a lot of time... This is a terrible state for me to get in! I do not leave enough time for myself, especially my relationship with God! I swear if I leave my phone for 5 minutes I come back to either an email, text or missed call that needs to be answered. It's overwhelming when you feel like you have to be "on call" 24/7 and have pressure to respond to other people or else.
Rob Bell spoke at Belmont University tonight. Now, I know there has been a lot of talk about his new "controversial" book but I don't feel the need to talk about it on here because 1. I have not read the book and 2. I just do not study Rob Bell's beliefs enough to have an argument. However, I was inspired by some of the things he said tonight like...
"God loves you whether people need you or not."
That struck me and I did not realize why until I sat down and began to type this post. As I am typing even, I have no idea where this is going so we'll see hah
With that quote I kind of stepped back and realized 1) No one honestly needs me and 2) I am taking too much credit. I am acting like if I don't help or respond the world will end. I have a problem with giving too much of myself and breaking down eventually- I often forget to fill up with Christ, so by the time I reach the end of my tank there is literally nothing left and I want to just curl up in a ball. My old religion teacher used to always tell me that I give too much of myself and it is dangerous. I understand what she means exactly because I get caught up in it still -not as much but it is a habit that I am learning to break.
It's like when my tank runs empty in my car and my moms gets so mad because she always tells me to fill it back up when the tank is half way full and not wait until I have 0 miles left.... What if I get stuck out in the middle of nowhere and your tank runs out? I am not made of gasoline - I can't help at all! Also, if we wait until the very end then it takes so much longer to fill back up, doesn't it? Why not just fill back up every time we use our "gas" so that we are never empty?
-Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world."
-"Sir," they said, "from now on give us this bread."
-Then Jesus declared, " I am the break of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and He who believes in me will never be thirsty."
John 6:32-35
You see? God never runs out. There is always plenty to fill up with and if I have this unlimited supply, why would I go anywhere else? When I am running on empty, all I have to do is ask for more.
1 Any thoughts? Comment!:
Thank you for this post, Cassidy! It was encouraging to me.
Kiersten
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