Blaaaaaah

I am frustrated. I feel awkward and in a place of uncertainty.  What to do or where to go?  Why can't I just settle and have peace with what seems like an easy solution?

I am upset.  I feel a bit of anger towards God.  I would have never admitted this before until a wise person reminded me that God can handle my frustration and anger.  So I am going to be honest with my Father.

I am unsure. The past few weeks I have been focusing on listening to God.  It's hard to listen when I feel like I am hearing contrasting things at different times.  Which way is His way? Discernment is what I need.

I am fickle.  I feel pulled in so many different directions.  I see pros and cons in each one but it never fails that I keep moving and eventually reach a point of breakdown because I am unable to do everything or please every person.

I am unable to satisfy.  It's dangerous when others trust you.  I want to pour the love out that God's given me but it hurts when I forget to fill back up and as a result feel the scraping of other people's need for more.  It's not my love they want or need but how to show that?

As I get all of these things out I see the common denominator.  

I am trying to be God.

I am not God.  

God is perfect. 

And I guess that is the only thing I can know for sure right now.